So I went out with a bunch of friends today to go play Laserquest in mississauga, had a great time shooting each other and eating pizza afterwards. Get home, and log onto the internet when my cellphone starts ringing. Good friend of mine, so I answer, when I find out it's actually his mom.
So I'm confused as to why my friend's mom has just called me, and I figure it's because he hasn't come home yet and is calling to ask when we parted ways. Instead she drops a bomb and tells me that some guy that I haven't seen since middle school (I'm trying to remember the last time i met up with him) has just committed suicide this afternoon (yesterday afternoon if you will.)
I'm kind of sitting on the phone, in silence and shock wondering a) why would he do that? and b) why is she telling me this? A) I have no answer to because I really didn't know Aaron Tarek (if you want to pray for his family) very well, but sitting and reflecting about B), I'm kind of thinking that God is poking me here. Why's that? Well I'll add on to this story by telling another.
The other day I randomly met a friend from high school (whom I've also met up with at university randomly) at Finch station. We got to talking and he told me that another girl that was heavily involved in the drama club at my high school died in a motorcycle accident at the beginning of the summer.
This has gotten me to thinking about all the people that i know that I HAVEN'T shared the Gosepl with. People that may have never heard a proper presentation of the Gospel. And even people that I don't know that God will have me cross paths with. Will I care enough about these people as GOd cares for them to share the path to eternal life with them? Will I get over my fear of rejection and my fear of looking ridiculously like some JW, 0r Mormon or something and love other people and care for their final destination enough to share with them? I realized that I'm getting far too comfortable... thinking I'm invincible and all and that death is far off. But really death isn't that far off. Death is just around the corner, and we should be living our lives like today is the last day of our life. And what will I do with that last day? Waste it playing video games or just sitting around doing nothing?
I don't really have the answers to the questions I'm posing above, but I figured that sharing it would make it easier to bear than just brooding about it all by my lonesome.
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3 comments:
wow jon...that's some heavy stuff to be dealt last night...totally unexpected I'm sure. It's sad sometimes how God has to use something like death to put the urgency back into His truth.
It reminds me of the song "Here I Go Again" by Casting Crowns. I played it for you guys during I think the last training session...it homes with me everytime I hear it:
Father, hear my prayer
I need the perfect words
Words that he will hear
And know they're straight from You
I don't know what to say
I only know it hurts
To see my only friend slowly fade away
Chorus:
So maybe this time
I'll speak the words of life
With Your fire in my eyes
But that old familiar fear
is tearin' at my words
What am I so afraid of?
'Cause here I go again:
Talkin' 'bout the rain
And mullin' over things
that won't live past today
And as I dance around the truth
Time is not his friend
This might be my last chance
to tell him that You love Him
But here I go again
Here I go again
Lord, You love him so
You gave Your only Son
If he will just believe
He will never die
But how then will he know
What he has never heard?
Lord he has never seen mirrored in my life
You love him, You love him
What am I so afraid
What am I so afraid
What am I so afraid of?
How then will he know
What he has never heard?
-----
Thanks for the great reminder, jon. know that you're in my prayers and that i've been inspired to re-discover the urgency again too...thanks :)
Sooo true...the frailty of life got me thinking about the eternal perspective as well. Just last night I visited the site where my best friend died.
Strange the way one moment you're hanging out together making plans for the weekend. Then those plans never happen.
In the last little while I have been reminded of a line from a song by a gotee records artist. "This life's too short don't waste it."
thats so weird. I was out at a clothing store with my friend mel and we saw our friend Brian's mom. We were both brought back to high school memories of going to his wake - he jumped in front of a transport. The strangest part was that we were in the pictures on his memory board at the wake, because we were all close friends in elementary school. I actually "dated" him in that 4th grade fashion.
I've never had anyone close taken from me, but my close friend from Queen's actually attempted suicide and was almost successful. Thankfully she found the Lord through that circumstance and is now an incredible woman of God.
Because of experiences like that, and yours jon, and just in getting to know some non-christians so well this summer, i've really begun to understand Evangelism with Urgency.
Thanks for the reminder, and thanks for sharing, Jon! You & his family will be in our prayers.
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